| More Twilight Shame |
[Nov. 19th, 2009|05:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  shocked | ] |
In the London Times, they posted the top 100 books of the decade. I was curious to see which of them I'd read. Since they rarely put any genre books on those lists, I figured I'd probably have read 2 of the books listed. I was wrong. I'd read 3. Go me! And there were actually other books by authors I still want to read, like Zadie Smith and Salman Rushdie and Ian Rankin. Stuff that makes sense, you know?
But, much to my horror, one of the books listed was...you guessed it. Twilight. I shit you not. I just can't get away from this fucking thing! I actually did a double take. Then I went back to the start of the article--I thought maybe I'd read it wrong. Maybe it was "favourite 100 books of the decade" or "most popular 100" or "whiniest and most melodramatic books of the decade." Nope. Top 100 Best Books of the Decade.
I...just...there are no words. And you know, you can usually rely on the British to have some sense in these matters.
You know what else was on there? The Da Vinci Code. I feel like I have received twin-kickboxers-separated-at-birth blows to the sternum. Call me, JCVD, I need a muscle rub and a hot toddy.
On the bright side, I am getting to see Stephen King tonight, so not all is lost.
p.s. Why is the emoticon for "shocked" a happy face? Weird. |
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| Most depressing thing I have read this month |
[Nov. 17th, 2009|12:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
'HarperCollins has even rereleased "Wuthering Heights," Bella's favorite book, with "Twilight"-themed covers.'
(from a Salon.com article)
Sigh. |
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| Paranormal Activity and Maurice Sendak |
[Oct. 22nd, 2009|10:51 am] |
Not together, though.
Paranormal Activity was awesome. Monkey and I were afraid to be alone in the house after that. Came very close to sleeping with the light on! Highly recommended. The Vampire's Assistant was actually pretty good too--lots of fun and circus freaks and battling vampires and such. But for kids. Mostly. : )
And, best news yet this week? It seems that Maurice Sendak, when asked what he'd said to parents who were worried that Where the Wild Things Are (the film) was too violent, said that he'd tell them to go to hell. Awesome. Fucking awesome. He is my new best (fake) friend! |
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| Cake |
[Oct. 21st, 2009|03:09 pm] |
Indulged myself with some cake for my birthday. Yum! Going to see The Vampire's Assistant tonight (got free passes) followed by Paranormal Activity, which has gotten good buzz. A good way to celebrate, methinks.
Saw Poltergeist again recently--I'd forgotten what a really good movie that is--it's well-written, the character stuff is terrific, and there are genuinely scary moments. I also particularly like the parts where the family is at first bemused by what's happening--chairs moving around? Cool! You know, before it all goes to hell. Big scary evil head at the end--a bit hokey. But still--a great little film. Too bad the sequel was so awful. Though of course Scary Preacher Man was the shit. |
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| smiley face, begone |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|03:23 pm] |
It occurred to me today that emoticons are the equivalent of a laugh track. A laugh track played by some asshole who thinks everything he says is funny, but you're too stupid to get that it's funny, so you need to be told. And by "some asshole," I mean you. And me. [wink! wink! tongue-sticking-out smiley face!]
I think we should have weird emoticons instead. Confuse your friends! (And I'm not talking about the pornolicious emoticons. Good on ya, motherfuckers, who made those up--enjoy your long-faded moment of mild internet fame.) I'm talking nonsensical emoticons. Like if Edward Lear or Ogden Nash were alive today and active on the internets. Wouldn't that be fun? I've taken it on myself to do this.
My favourite that I've made up so far is this--
: : : : )
What is that, you ask? It's a happy spider.
There. Don't forget to credit me when using. |
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| And furthermore... |
[Sep. 22nd, 2009|03:16 pm] |
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...if I see the word "intertextuality" used ONE MORE FUCKING TIME in...well...ANYTHING, I will seriously LOSE my SHIT. |
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| Sick & Tired |
[Sep. 22nd, 2009|03:07 pm] |
Had a massive, crazy falling out with my mother, worst one in a decade. Worse even than some of the terrible moments in Estonia in July. Exhausting. Promptly got sick after that of course...into a nice spiralling misery starting last Wednesday with exhaustion and upset tummy and a bit of fever, culminating with full-on hacking, choking cough, the kind that shakes your body and makes your ribs hurt. That was all day Sunday and yesterday. I lay on the sofa and wheezed. Couldn't get any writing done. Just felt like ass.
I was trying to think of the last time I didn't feel sick or stressed or run down. I have had bursts of happiness, and, don't get me wrong, I've had many of them, but sometimes I feel like after a certain number of blows, you don't really walk upright any more. You kind of crawl along and keep going, and you think that's good, because you don't really remember it being any different.
I wish I could feel lighthearted again. I wish my great-aunt and great-uncle and Brett's stepdad were still alive. I wish things didn't make me so tired. I wish I mattered at my day job.
I wish everything wasn't such a bag of suck sometimes. |
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| Stoopid frakkin Nights in Rodanthe |
[Aug. 25th, 2009|03:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
So, on the weekend, I was tired of writing my novel and just need something cheap and cheerful to clear my brain. I wandered downstairs to my dear friend and foe, the telly-vision and checked to see what was on. The Movie Network was just starting up Nights in Rodanthe, some dumbass "romantic" movie with Diane Lane and Richard Gere. Now, normally, I'd be, like, "Gah!" but I couldn't muster the energy for anything with a plot that I cared about. I got out my key lime coconut chocolate dessert thingies, courtesy of Pelayo (thank you!) and settled in with a cuppa for some pap.
Gentle readers, it was horrifying. Well, I expected it to be bad, but I've liked Gere & Lane together before (Cotton Club, Unfaithful), so I thought why not. Foolish me! It turns out this insane garbage was vomited into the world by none other than the vile Nicholas Sparks who brought you such execrable turds as Message in a Bottle--ANOTHER film I ended up watching late one Sunday night out of sheer inertia. So now there's four hours of my life I will never get back, thanks to Nicholas Sparks! Dude, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. I understand that you're writing these novels for women, and that the films are geared toward women, but, motherfucker, I gotta say--I personally do not know one single woman who would not think Rodanthe wasn't a piece of shit. Have you written any books in which the male love interest doesn't die a tragic and untimely (yet noble) death, but it's okay because he taught the woman he left behind To Love Again???? God.
Even Gere and Lane who are pretty likeable in other stuff can't pull this off. Not even the amazing Viola Davis can save it!!! And seriously, the only scenes that zing are when she's on-screen. Why does no one give that woman a real vehicle of her own? Why??? And poor James Franco as dead Richard Gere's son--he looks like he just got out of rehab, but it's probably just the shame of having to speak the idiotic dialogue. Or his shock at having narrowly escaped a CGI mudslide. Who can tell??
Oh, and to add insult to injury, there's the uplifting scene near the end where the wild ponies run on the beach! It's so miraculous! It's so life-affirming! Because the ponies never run that far on the beach! But now they have! So even if Richard Gere has been swallowed by mud in Ecuador or Bolivia or wherever, still, faith and hope and love prevail! And ponies!!! The ponies!! Any person on this planet that thinks this dreck is in any way romantic, needs to be slapped upside the head several times.
Argh. SO pissed I wasted my time. But, as usual, I sat there thinking, "Oh, it can't be as clichéd as all that. They wouldn't really...would they? Nah!" And they do!!! It was like watching a train wreck happening. A deeply, fundamentally, seriously boring train wreck.
Nicholas Sparks, I take my hat off to you. You are now the king of shitty drama in my book. You have topped even Dan Brown. And that takes some doing. (Oh, and whoever the crapass screenwriters & director were? I blame you too.) |
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| ChiZine Pubs & WorldCon rocked! |
[Aug. 12th, 2009|03:59 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited | ] |
So, despite difficulties with the convention and being left out of the programme book, and then further drama when our book launch got picked up by media outlets, making the hotel freak out... in the end, the convention was a huge success for us. I think we sold about 75% of our stock, and about a third of that on the night of our launch party at the Delta Hotel in Montreal on August 8th. Yea us! The books looked gorgeous, the authors were all in fine form, and I think Brett, Matt Moore (our publicist/web guy) and I kinda rocked the house ourselves. We actually sold out of Claude Lalumière's, Brent Hayward's and Bob Boyczuk's books at the con, and almost sold out of Dave Nickle's. If you haven't seen our lovely books before, check 'em out: http://chizinepub.com.
We have more trade paperbacks available, and we're going to reprint Bob & Brent's books as well.
Also had a great chat with my agent Monica from the Anne McDermid Agency. (I now say "my agent" as often as possible, in a completely unbearable way, you know, like when the newly engaged say "my fiancé.") Anyway, we dissected my upcoming book, other people's books that might be similar to mine, and, more importantly, the lack of giant squid in Watchmen. Vital discussions, fellow babies. Vital.
More con news later!
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| I HAVE AN AGENT!! |
[Jul. 30th, 2009|04:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | ecstatic | ] |
So, oh my god! I sent 4 chapters and an outline of this novel I'm working on to the Anne McDermid Agency. And they signed me. So now I'm scrambling to get it done for September.
But I'm so excited!!! I have agent!
How the fuck did that happen??? : ) |
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| sad news |
[Jul. 15th, 2009|12:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sad | ] |
It really seems to be the week of tragedies. My dear friend Jason Taniguchi's mom passed away on Monday. She was a wonderful lady. Heartbreaking. Jason had the kind of relationship with his mother that I always wished for.
And I just got the news that Phyllis Gotlieb died yesterday. She was another amazing lady--and she was a real inspiration to me. Always ready with a kind word and encouragement, or a wry and witty remark. Her poetry and fiction were SO good. Her poem "ms. and mr. frankenstein" remains one of my favourite poems of all time.
RIP, Mrs. T. and Mrs. G. You will both be missed more than you know. |
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| more novel material! |
[Jun. 18th, 2009|01:11 pm] |
So I just came up with another novel idea. Steampunk. Or rather, screampunk (who else has coined this word? Someone else must have come up with it)--as it contains zombies. And gizmos. And Houdini. And Kali. And stuff. |
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| Zing! |
[Jun. 18th, 2009|01:10 pm] |
"You can't hide from gravity!"
(Apparently from some Deep Impact/Armageddon/Meteor TV movie clone airing on Sunday on ABC.)
Best. Line. Ever.
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| Novel |
[Jun. 4th, 2009|11:15 am] |
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So, apparently, I'm a novelist. I wrote four chapters of a novel. I wrote an outline. I sent them to an agent who was interested in seeing them. Whoda thunk? Fingers crossed, now. Gulp. |
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| Lovecraft meets Cloverfield meets Tim Powers: Tel Aviv Dossier |
[May. 25th, 2009|01:09 pm] |
If you haven't checked out the latest offering from ChiZine Publications, you really should: The Tel Aviv Dossier by Lavie Tidhar and Nir Yaniv. It's sort of like a bunch of Cthulhu-esque monstrosities rampaged through Tel Aviv by way of Tim Powers' Declare, with a soupçon of Cloverfield... plus some original and highly enjoyable wackadoo shit that I just can't get enough of.
Plus it's 15% off for the trade pb right now:
http://jack-yoniga.livejournal.com/264284.html
Some very lyrical craziness, plus nudity, violence, monsters, and all kinds of other good things! How can you go wrong?
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| A Bargain at Twice the Price - only today!! |
[Apr. 24th, 2009|11:59 am] |
The Sextrology Anthology, edited by the ever-fabulous Sephera Giron, is 20% off at www.ravenousromance.com today! It has my smutty story "Wind & Glass" in it! Buy! Buy! Buy!
My story's also available as a stand-alone purchase for...$1.99, I think? The antho is something like $4.99 or $5.99. Cheap even without the discount. Download now. It's Friday and you need some smut for the weekend.
: )
Ever yours in porn, gentle reader.
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